How do you feel your sense of identity influences your creativity?
I had a relatively recent revelation that it’s impossible to be creative and properly express your musical thoughts if you’re trying to be someone you’re not. Lockdown has been tough in many ways, but I think it has given a lot of us some much-needed time and space for self-reflection, and the opportunity to think more carefully about our sense of identity.
This manifests itself slightly more obviously for me when I think about conducting: when I first started out as a choral conductor I found myself performing a very male role. I would speak lower, I cut my hair short, and I always wore blazers and trousers. It’s only in the past 5 years or so, as I’ve become more comfortable with being myself on the podium, that I'm allowing myself to be vulnerable and as a result having musical experiences that are far more meaningful and profound.
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